There is a new addition to the family. She doesn’t have a name yet, but she certainly has a voice. A very loud and piercing voice that drills into our ears and eats our brains.
I’ll let her express her joy at joining the family:
Help!! Assholes have abducted me! One minute I’m in the house I was born in, then I’m wrapped in a blanket that I’m sure was laced with Kitty Cocaine, and now I’m in HELL!
WHERE IS MY BROTHER?! WHERE IS MY MOTHER?! What have you done with them, Hell Spawn? I don’t care that those treats are delicious, I want to go home. Now!
WHERE IS MY BROTHER?! WHERE IS M……Oooo, that’s a very nice Pooper. And I don’t have to share? HA! The joke is on you because I’m just going to fling litter everywhere and refuse to poop. That should teach you a thing or two about abducting kittens!
Nice blanket. But I’m not going anywhere near it in case you think it will excuse my Abduction.
No. I’m not eating…..I’m on a hunger strike. Same for water…..even if it is burbling out of a fountain. Nothing shall pass these lips until I am returned home.
Is that a feather?! Oh my God!! That’s just cruel! I can’t resist them! No, don’t make it wiggle around…..no, no, no. FINE! I’ll chase it but the moment it stops I’m going home! Or behind this big brown thing.
Put me down, put me down, put me down! Oh wow! Your legs are extraordinarily warm and comfortable, Hell Spawn. And I have to admit that I like the way you talk to me. Not the female….just you. Keep her away from me! I’m fairly sure that this whole debacle is her fault, though you are not excused for the part you played in it. You are just the sympathetic jailor, right?
This spot, right here, on your belly, is the only place I shall sleep. No, that’s an inch and a half too far to the right – I can’t sleep there. No, this is where I shall sleep. Your arm falling asleep is no concern of mine.
ZZZzzzz…..damn you! You twitched and I’m awake now! WHERE’S MY BROTHER?! WHERE’S MY MOTHER?! I don’t want water. I don’t want food. I don’t want a tr…..okay, I’ll take a treat, but nothing else!
I’m really tired now; too exhausted to call for my people but I am going to sit here behind this big thing, and sway back and forth, and back and forth. I was up all night long and being abducted is very stressful so it’s no wonder I’m having difficulty keeping my eyes open.
Hey! Don’t touch me, female! No touchy! No tou…..oh, that feels nice! That’s what my Mother always did. Do it some more. That blanket is even softer than it looked and somehow I feel better. And just so you know? That is not a purr; it is the sound of my fury building to epic proportions so I can slay you in my bid for freedom!
You do have very impressive and warm pillows though, and I like the way your chin is just touching my back. I need to rest for a moment; only a short moment.
You haven’t heard the last of my objections. I will never accept this hedonistic lifestyle and I’m prepared to battle to the end. Once I’m rested.
Some feather-related cruelty going on here. No cat can resist that much temptation.
LOL! Yes, the feather was the only thing that got her from under the sofa. Amazing how quickly she has settled in though. :o)